THE "GE" IN GUE In an article posted by Psychology Today, I read a sentence that thoroughly drew me in: "An authentic person may be sensitive to what others think yet choose not to subordinate themselves to the opinions or judgments of others. This is a key source of genuine self-esteem. " At first glance I was drawn towards the buzzwords authentic and genuine and hinting towards ideals of empathy. Next I evaluated the sentence and found it to be incredibly true. Empathy and genuineness are concepts that intertwine one and the other in a fine line that ebbs and flows through the interactions of everyday. Empathy is no doubt a skill as is being genuine. However, one can negate the other. If we attempt to be empathic without genuineness we miss the mark wholly. If we attempt to be genuine and lose ourselves in empathy we are not being genuine at all.  This is explained in the article by being genuine in terms or self esteem. One must avoid behaviors that elicit self betrayal. You cannot be genuine while losing yourself in the emotions of another person in an empathic transaction that leaves you barren with nothing else to give. I have struggled with this concept for many many years as someone who would label themselves both inclined to be in empathic as well as emotionally sensitive. The trick I have found is that when we feel inclined to be empathetic emotionally, I sometimes need to take the measures of separating the emotions of the emoter and the empath. This can go also go both ways. I don't feel that one necessarily needs to discard their own emotions when being empathetic because they are differing in degree of joy or sadness. The goal is to honor the feelings of others while also honoring our own. A field that this dance undoubtedly takes place in is Therapeutic Recreation. In order to be a good therapist you are required to have the skills of being empathetic and genuine. I also found another article on the difference between empathy and sympathy in  therapeutic settings: "I believe that it is important not to confuse empathy with sympathy-there is a big difference. Sympathy is to give another person support and emotional comfort because of the pain or distress they may be experiencing. Empathy is to enter the private world of another person so as to understand that world, whether sympathy is offered or not." The disabled community gets more than enough sympathy from the people around them that don't understand their conditions. Our job as professionals is to advocate and believe in our client's ability to attain quality of life even if the situation is difficult and emotional. It is what makes this field so challenging and beautiful in my opinion. It is a dance I hope to master one day not only as a therapist, but as all of the aspects of my life. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/shift-mind/201208/seeking-authenticity http://www.freecontentweb.com/content/basic-counselling-skills-and-their-usefulness-empathy-acceptance-warmth-and-genuineness Bolton, R. (1986). People skills: how to assert yourself, listen to others, and resolve conflicts. New York: Simon & Schuster.

Blog Post 1: Behavioral Inventories

In class we discussed the idea of behavior and personality being different in their rate of flexibility. We agreed that behaviors can be changed and that personalities were more stagnant. This can be backed up by phenomena in psychology such as group behaviors drastically changing in social situations to fit norms. Psychological studies have shown trends in personality traits such as friendliness and eagerness towards novel experiences generally do not change as we age. 

Bolton on the contrary, focuses more on the unconscious realm of behavior. That it is in a sense innate and and inflexible. He chooses to categorize the personality types into 4 quadrants of, "People Styles". These 4 quadrants are Analytical, Driver, Amiable, and Expressive. These are based off of levels of Assertiveness and Responsiveness. I agree mostly with my scoring of an Expressive. I tend to wear my emotions on my sleeve as well as being aware of my ability to assert myself. 

I have also taken my fair share of assessments that are more personality than behavior based. Every once in awhile I take the 16 personalities Myers Briggs quiz as a way to check in with myself to see what has happened or changed. Thus far, I have scored the same ENFJ every single consecutive time with little to no variance in each category. I'm not quite sure if it is better that I have been consistent over the past 2 years or worse that I have not fluctuated at all. Whether that supports the theories of Bolton or Psychology's Big 5 personality trait theories I'm not so sure.

These tools are incredibly useful for my future careers. It is in self exploration that we really grow as employees, co workers, as people with purpose. As they say, the key to understanding others is in understanding ourselves. Introspection is quote the powerful tool. Sometimes putting yourself in a box is a great step in the process of unpacking who it is YOU really are. (Peep that metaphor)

Bolton, R., & Bolton, D. G. (2009). People Styles at Work-- and Beyond: Making Bad Relationships          

Good and Good Relationships Better. New York: American Management Association.